It's been 2 years........

I could remember standing in the doorway of the triage room and my mom saying to me, "baby why are you standing here?" I told her that I didn't feel like sitting down anymore and she gently put her hand behind my back and guided me back to the bed. I woke up the next day, I was in This room that looked like a bubble and I saw my Pastor, my Elder standing at the foot of this bed that I was laying in. My husband was in a chair sitting at the top of the bed next to me, my dad was standing next to him and my mom was in the back, slightly sitting with tears in my eyes. I didn't know what was going on and as I went to open my mouth to ask a question, I could barely speak. I was hooked up to so many machines, I heard them so clearly beeping as they monitored my heart, brain waves and a ton of other things. I was able to say, "what happened?" And everyone just stared at me in disbelief, as if they didn't expect me to speak. As if they didn't know that I was going to was up. Then I heard someone say "you had a seziure last night........." And then the voice drifted off. I might have been my husband who said it or my dad or my mom.........honestly......I don't really know because I was still in shock at this seizure they said that I had and then the fact that I could barely talk, everyone looking at me so strange.......it was a lot to process. 

My husband stared at me as I laid there and later on when everyone left he told me that the doctors asked him if he had any funeral plans for me because they knew not if I was going to make it. He didn't know what to think. We had a new baby at home and 2 other children and he never saw this life without us raising them together. He held his composure but I couldn't when he told me that. I play that scene in my mind (well how I think it panned out) every now and again. Had I left this earth prematurely what would become of the things that I left. 

 

So for 3 weeks I stayed at the hospital. 2 weeks in ICU and 1 week in neurology. I had lost so much weight and even my skin color was different. I was told that I was very dark, the kind of dark that you see when someone is deteriorating from death. I was always confused and barely had an appetite. I missed my children so much and as laid in the bed day in and day out, I fought to remember them. See I had lost almost everything in that moment. Not just my memory but my sense of life, the things that I once craved, my health, my dreams, my aspiration, I had lost my sense of living.........*sigh* 

The power, the healing power of God sustained my life and when the death angel walked in the room that night, Christ stood up on my behalf. I don't even remember asking Him to save me but He did. I don't remember what I mouthed to Him but He heard me. I can't even fathom why God did what He did for me because....I don't even know a "because" I just know that I am forever indebted to Him as long as I have breath in my lungs and life in my body. 

Today is my new birthday!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!! It's been 2 years since I looked death in the face and was brought back from it. It's been 2 years of dealing with anxiety, battling depression and all the things that I don't share with the people around me. Near death experiences do that to you. Some ppl suffer Post Traumatic stress disorder, some anxiety and etc........it's  been 2 years that I lost and now thankfully, I've found. It's been 2 years but today......those 2 years are only a testament to what God can do, not just for me but for you. If He can bring me back from the dead.........what more can He do for you?? 

Don't give up! He's working it out for you too! 

Won't you join me in celebrating my 2 years of NEW LIFE, RENEWED HEALTH, GROWTH AND MOST OF ALL LOVE!!!

God....you did that!! All praises due to you!! 

This is a True story........